Thoughts

Last month I started graduate school. Which seems impossible to me, because it was not that long ago that I made the completely random decision to go in the first place. It all happened when I was driving to Atlantic City by way of Philadelphia, newly graduated from ODU and with no fucking clue what to do with my life. I remember being so tense about having no direction and no plan and no desire to do anything. I was sitting in my car worrying and looking forward to gambling my cares away when it happened. Right around Maryland the thought fell into my head that I should look into art therapy. And instead of questioning it, or wondering where the hell that came from, I pulled up to my friend’s apartment, asked to borrow her laptop, and looked up the requirements to be accepted into art therapy programs. And the next minute I was calling my mom and asking her how soon I could re-enroll at ODU in order to take the 24 hours of credits I needed to apply. And then I went to Atlantic City and played the slots all night.

And that summer I went back to school and took four psychology classes, and then I got a job at a pottery studio, and then I took four art studio classes, and then I applied, and then I went to an interview, and then I was accepted. And that was that.
And not once did I ever stop to question if it was right, or why a momentary thought on a crowded highway should change the whole course of everything. I guess I was so happy to have something to do that I didn’t want to question it. The powers that be had given me a gift and there was no way I was going to worry about why.

I just recently started thinking about why I made that choice, but truthfully it never really felt like a decision at all. It was just something I had to do.

And now I am in the middle of it, and no shit, it is difficult. It is tearing my brain apart and depriving me of sleep and patience and general hygiene. But when I look towards the future it seems brighter and more exciting than it ever has before.

So I would like to thank my grandma for my deep desire to play the slots, because I know that’s where I get it. And also, that episode of Full House where Stephanie goes to see an art therapist. Obviously, that episode made quite an impression on me.

Sad to see me go?

I think I might be a zombie

Y’all know I’ve never met a boundary I wouldn’t violate.

I would just like to know

…why I look like Jesus?

Make You Sweat

Just recently the music of Keith Sweat has been introduced to me and I have to say I am totally enthralled. I’ve never been much of a fan of R&B, but his lyrics just speak to my soul. For instance:

I wanna go outside (Go outside)
Baby, baby (In the rain), the rain will wipe my tears
Whoa, whoa, I wanna go outside (I wanna go outside)
I’ve got to go, nowhere to go (In the rain) in the rain, yeah

LYRICAL GOLD.

Even more impressive, I just learned that there is a Keith Sweat McNuggets Lover Club and that he actually wrote a song about McNuggets. Listen here. You have to listen to this; it is a love song about his 25 year love affair with McNuggets. Seriously. If you’re going to sell out, there’s no point in half assing it, yamean? I mean there is even a fan club!!! You can join here.

I realize that Keith Sweat is a departure from my normal playlist of Passion Pit and Dolly Parton, but it’s important to keep an open mind and listen to new artists, especially ones that treat their fans like this:

Also, listening to Keith Sweat will most likely give your ego a boost in regards to both your voice and your ability to write R&B. And I don’t know about you, but that’s exactly why I listen to music in the first place.

The Gift That Keeps On Giving

Every once in a while my brain comes up with something that surprises even me (and the bear, for that matter). And this happened recently when I decided that the perfect gift for my near and dear friend Laura would be a condom dispenser for her bedside table, naturally. So I enlisted the help of two of our more creative friends, and wham bam thank you ma’am we turned an inoffensive tea bag dispenser into a whimsically offensive prophylactic caddy replete with our own condom brands: Robin Bottom’s Robust Rubbers, Mary Ellen Iroyhymen’s Ball Busters, Connie Twatwaffle’s Hot Dog Bun Benders, and Tammy Kegle’s Lady Lovers.
The perfect gift for any sexually active 25 year old.

Ahoy, loyal followers

I was trying to go for continuity and name my blog “frangia”, but that was taken by some other crazed fan of Italian bangs. So this will have to do. It is an homage to three of my favorite Americans: Francis Scott Key, F. Scott Fitzgerald, and Topher Grace. Not necessarily in that order, obviously.